Anniversary Dinner

For our anniversary dinner, we chose Buca Di Beppo. Which turned out to be Buca Di Crappo.

Now, we like Buca. We've been there before. We went 2 years ago on Valentines Day before the Monster Truck Rally. That night was perfect and delicious.

Last night was still pretty delicious, but it tasted less so because of a few crappy details...

We called ahead so that we wouldn't have to wait for a table. So, we arrived and instantly it was our turn to follow the hostess. She seated us at this table:

Apparently it was a spare table they threw together last minute and hoped some suckers take it and not complain. Luckily we are not suckers.

Let's talk about what's wrong with this table:

1. It's a high traffic area. See all those waitresses? They're running back and forth, setting down dirty dishes (2 feet from us) and settling customers' bills. We could literally feel a breeze every few minutes from the proximity and the swiftness.

2. Filth

We were surrounded by filth. Right next to my head was an abandoned half-empty glass (I'm being pessimistic here: half empty). No one cared to bus this glass the whole time we were there (even after we switched tables). There was also a curious splatter on the wall next to us...

3. Garbage

There was a garbage can directly behind Kelly's seat. Gross. I think they seated us in prison.

There is also a stack of checks behind Kelly. See that?

Unacceptable

So, we told the nearest hostess we were unhappy. She said, "Sorry, this is all we have," and rushed off.

We planned on leaving, but before we could make our way to the door our server arrived.

We told our server, who looked like Ashton Kutcher, that we were unhappy. He said, "I'll ask the host what I can do." We thought: good luck.

Ashton's Solution: We'll move you to the booth just behind you as soon as that couple leaves. Can I start you off with some appetizers?

Our Response: We'll see...

So, we waited for the corsage-wearing couple to leave while wondering, are we being punked? We were pretty sure we were being punked.

We eventually moved to the booth where we ordered our food and had crappy service.

Halfway through our meal, Ashton rushed by and said, "Let me grab you guys some big plates." We had been eating off the bread plates.

Our drinks were only refilled 2 minutes before we asked for the check.

And to top it all off, while Ashton was attempting to cart off our leftovers, he spilled oil all over Kelly's seat which splattered on his arm and jeans.

We left a meager tip.

While we ate, they also tried seating 2 other couples at that Garbage Prison Table. It didn't go so well. Why were you trying to seat people in prison, Buca? WHY?

It made for a very memorable first anniversary dinner.

Happy Anniversary, Kelly!

Year 2 starts tomorrow!